School reunions and the nature of change

Mr Yates class

By Jane Comben

I was invited to my school reunion this week. Surprisingly, I'll be in the UK on the date so I can go if I want to.

There are many people I haven't seen in 30 years, so I suppose it's not surprising that some of the names and faces (on the facebook invite) don't ring any bells. It has made me think about what I've done and where I've been in that time. Since Tophill Junior I've attended four educational establishments, worked seven jobs, lived in four cities, had 12 addresses and emigrated. That's a lot of new faces.

"For everything you have missed, you have gained something else, and for everything you gain, you lose something else." Ralph Waldo Emerson

 
I love Portland where I grew up. I never really intended to leave on a permanent basis but it was definitely light on graphic design jobs. While some people have a clear plan of the direction they'll take in their education or career, I've usually taken a more "suck it and see" approach.
"What subjects am I good at?" ... take that at college.
"Yay, I've landed a job" ... move to London.
"Somewhere that speaks English, not too hot and sounds nice" ... New Zealand!


"You may ask yourself, well how did I get here?" Talking Heads

In general this has worked out pretty well. It's often amazed me that I can be stuck in an everyday-is-much-the-same holding pattern and can't really imagine 5 or 10 years hence, but turn around and look back over those years and I've travelled to another life. Another house, another job, even another country or husband.

"Sometimes it's the smallest decisions that change your life forever" Keri Russell

Just like cumulative interest in a retirement fund, there's immense power in cumulative change. Apparently, an extra latte a day (about 200 calories) could make you 10 kg heavier by the end of the year or 50kg over 5. (I'd better make that a trim then!)

"Simple it's not, I'm afraid you will find, for a mind-maker-upper to make up his mind." Dr Seuss

There are times when the "suck it and see" approach... well, just sucks. Sometimes I've ended up in a place I hadn't intended at all. It wasn't pretty. There's a lot of snot and tears for a start and agonizing over how to get out of the mess is exhausting. Sometimes the choice was scary but rewarding. Sometimes I've decided one thing, then changed quickly to another.

Change what you can change, accept what you can't 

Sometimes the unexpected just happens. If you're lucky, the unexpected is a massive Lotto win. Realistically, I'd have to buy a ticket for that to happen to me.

"The past is a foreign country: they do things differently there" L P Hartley

I've never actually been to a reunion but the idea seems to polarize people. Reunions are seen as fantastic fun or a lame way for the insecure to measure themselves to their peers. For me, whether I go or not is almost irrelevant as I've really enjoyed looking back.

But if I do?
Well, I'll probably be the sentimental fool that's developed a funny accent and doesn't remember your name. BUT (let it be noted fellow students!) I still have a full head of hair.
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