By Jane Comben Don't take it personally, but I probably avoid calling you. It's not that I don't like you, it's just I'd rather not. If I can help it.
My name is Jane and I'm a teeny bit telephobic. I'm naturally shy and at the age of 5 I was falsely accused of shoplifting chewing gum. The terror of that, and being frisked by the shopkeeper, probably didn't help my reticence. I digress. Apparently there's a whole phobia devoted to people who have a "reluctance to or fear of taking or making phone calls" (Wikipedia). "Telephobes" to their friends.
Like any phobia a bit of aversion therapy can work a charm. After graduating, getting a proper design job in London was just that. For 6 months I'd visit the local phone box in my lunch hour and cold call agencies for a chance to show them my portfolio. It was horrible but after a few months I could get past the receptionist and convince the busy agency owner he could spare me 10 minutes. If I was particularly courageous, I'd bag a few appointments for my weekly trek to London. I was practically invincible!
I should probably admit that my first design job was at a tiny local firm that funded my trips to London. A handwritten letter from my Mum helped me secure the post. The letter was prompted by a tiny advert in the back of the local paper, an advert I had snubbed. A lesson learnt that, yes, your mother probably IS right (and the big guns in London don't need to know how low-rent the company is).
Finally, I got a London job and just as I was enjoying the use of faxes there dawned a new technological age. None of us could imagine this "world wide web" or who we'd be sending emails to. Or, a few years later, the point of texts. How blind I was to the telephone-avoiding potential of these wonders.
Of course these "new" technologies weren't without difficulties. Quick recap: don't send anything you wouldn't want your grandmother/girlfriend/boss to see.
Today, I need to work at phoning people rather than relying on electronic communication. Perhaps the recipient would prefer an email they can deal with in their own time, but probably not. Most people have enough in their inbox already.
So here are my tips for the phone averse:
- Keep the aversion therapy up – sometimes make yourself call rather than email/text/facebook. Starting your own business is good for this!
- Schedule the calls first thing and get them over with.
- Congratulate yourself.
- Make up for it in other ways. Be extra friendly in person, smile at strangers. Or send cards.
- Get a loquacious friend to show you the way.
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